I'm not sure where even to begin so let me start off with an apology. I want to say that I am deeply sorry for not staying connected to you in these past few months. You are a person that I value greatly and of whom I have the upmost respect for yet unfortunately, in what has been an extremely trying time for my emotional and physical health, I have chosen to isolate from those in my life who have meant the most and who truly I am in dire need of. I hope that you can find the smallest flicker of forgiveness in your heart to enable me back into your life. I am embarrassed I let so much time pass without communicating and talking to you. I began writing an e-mail to you about three weeks ago yet could not muster up the courage to hit send because I just felt so ashamed. Please know that I think about you (and your family) on a daily basis and care about you deeply. I would love to meet for coffee sometime to talk about life, like back in the old days...I miss my second Momma.
Love Always, Ilana
I received a response almost immediately that could not have been filled with more love and warmth. She emphasized that there was no need for an apology or to carry any feelings of shame, as it had also been a rough time for her. She closed the e-mail by saying that I would always be loved, especially by her. That sentiment truly made my day. After a couple more messages, we arranged a time and were able to meet and catch up yesterday afternoon. I had missed her so much and it literally felt like we had just picked up right where we left off a few months ago. Her words were so uplifting and reassuring; she restored a bit of faith in myself and I found great comfort in her presence. I cannot believe it took us this long to reconnect, but I am elated that we finally did and intend on seeing her often throughout the remainder of the semester. She is someone with whom I want to remain in contact with for life. Although just one person, it is a small step to restoring happiness and intimacy in my life and for that I feel proud.